Alison Mosshart

Is my lesbian crush.

When I get out of bed (you know I miss you)

Fakeness

I hate being used.
What I hate even more, is not to realize before it's too late.

Pre PMS

Haven't had any inspiration, neither time to focus on my blog. Have faced the reality - that I'm truly a dreamer who has lost all inspiration for everything. Can't take care of myself, my studies, family, work. Nothing. Maybe it's the pre PMS that's talking? Don't know. I hope so.

Anyway, I earlier wrote about I expect an addition to my family. She's two weeks old this Friday, is going to be named Greta and screams 24/7. For that I love her. J/K. It's crazy how you can love a creature who's been in your life for just a few weeks...

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SOMETIMES I WISH I WAS A GUY SO I COULD JAM MY DICK DOWN YOUR THROAT AND FUCK EVERYTHING YOU’VE EVER SAID ABOUT ME.

Ever felt someone controls your life?

Seriously.
I'm scared of myself.
And its getting worse for each day.
I'm slowly realizing it's starting to take control of my life.
Or, should I say HE.
Because it's a "he" that controls my life.
Whatever I do, includes him.
During classes, I fantasy about him.
During my working out I see him in front of me.
I know I'd do anything for him.
At the same time I "love" him, I hate him.
Because I'll become fucking devastated when he gets a girlfriend.
And It won't take a long time.
It should be me, but I doubt (read: know) he wouldn't date a fan.
Damn.
I wish this obsession would have an end.
But it won't.
Why must he be so fucking talented and handsome?
I hate you,
Robert Pattinson

Sincerly,
Sandra

Tomorrow. Please kill me.

Note to self: (what must "do:s" tomorrow)

• school
• gym
• STUDY (have this huge and important exam next week in Psychology)
• study even more for my PA-work, I just realized there's less than a month left til it should be handed in. I haven't even begun writing or made re-searches.
  

We've got a big mess on our hands

I've gained weight. It makes me feel horrible.

Stupido

FUCK. I overslept this morning and missed English class. At the moment, I'm drinking a cup of coffee and waiting to leave for school in a few minutes. Entertaining myself by surfing on youtube. I bursted out laughing when someone had written a comment about Rob Pattinson's song "Broken". She was wondering if he sang "I was broke" or "I was broken". Haha Supposed to have a test in History today but somehow, my thoughts doesn't seem to hold on to the information.

Marcus Foster & Bobby Long

Enjoy.

As if I'm religious

It's been a while since I saw Twilight. A week or so. I'm going to watch it once again in a few minutes... Must get some strength to manage going to church tomorrow morning. As if I'd enjoy it! I'm good during the Religion class but I'm not religious AT ALL. What I don't get is why they force us going to church a Saturday morning. I have better things to do, to study for the history and psychology exam at Tuesday and Wednesday. I'm doomed to fail at the moment. I must study for it straight when I get home from church tomorrow.

Every now and then, I'm grateful that I know Spanish, when you find a website like this for example. Have I told you a love that man?

I got a call from a friend of mine earlier tonight. She's soon finished with her Make Up artist education but has one final task left in April and she wants me to model for it. Catwalk, Photo shoot - you name it. "I'm going to be a supermodel.... lalalala" (continues singing)

Stupid stomach

My stomach is killing me, like seriously killing me. Haven't slept a minute during the night and I won't be able to do it tonight either. No school at all, instead I'll "wake up" early for a walk. After that, breakfast and later the gym. I hope my stomach will be better after doing that. I've also planned to study, History, Psychology and English.

Dead and done

This must have been the most ineffective weekend for a long time from one point of view. Sure, I've been working (fri, sat, sun) and earned a lot of money. I also went downtown yesterday to buy a new mascara from Make Up Store but haven't tried it yet. I don't get the hysteria about Valentines Day, I'm one of those who says "why celebrate it? we should give each other love every single day whatsoever!" but at the same time I'm contradiction since I bought flowers and sweets for my family. Uh?

I just got home from Kelly's place. Since I'm good with hair I've colored it a few times but we didn't finish it due to the fact she needs to buy some more different colors. The goal is to make it a color close to mine and I think it'll look awesome. I've planned to go to the gym tomorrow morning (will I manage to get out of bed?) and then color and cut her hair.

Speaking of beautyproducts, I need to buy a new foundation and I'm thinking of one from MAC. I've already had Dior, Lancome, YSL, Make Up Store, Clinique - you name it but I'm curious about the ones from MAC. Have you tried it?

And yeah... I still haven't realized the Blink-182 reunion.

The end.

Crawl

It's snow outside. A lot of it. I just got home from Kelly's place. Off to work in a few hours. I really don't want to. Meanwhile, I'm listening to Kings of Leon. Life's easier with them in my life. I can't make up my mind about what to do after work, I finish at 10.15 PM, I don't want to head home straight after but I'm also way too lazy to go out clubbing. Such a dilemma.

Never kiss your dreams goodbye

Freaky

I logged on a community a few minutes ago and someone had commented a picture of me. Mostly, you get happy about compliments but this one just made me feel uncomfortable. It said:

"I'm gonna be straight up with you. Your face is a perfect 10! You got the look of cuteness, desire, passion, beauty, astonishing eyes, and I can go on. You are blessed with the most beautiful face."

Seriously, why put THAT much effort by being detailed in a pic comment?

090209

Use your love

The few last days in pictures.

Me handle money? ME?!

I've spent way too much money the last two weeks, around 600 dollars or so. The problem is that if I'd been any thoughtful at all, I'd bought a new pair of glasses since I'm practically blind. I found a pair of glasses that I really liked today. I suppose I must wait two weeks more 'til I get my money to buy them.

I'm going to the gym in a few minutes, listen to Blink 182 and be all happy about the reunion.

Blink 182 reunion

BLINK 182 IS BACK!!! (I told you they would)
My first and biggest love.

What to do when you're bored

Pimp your agenda... I'm satisfied with mine. Can't make up my mind if it's because of the majority of the space is covered by Robert Pattinson or if the purple's gone...

The Sky Could Fall Tonight

Today: The mall with Malin. Later, some coffee with the Christodoulou's. Carolina above.

Yesterday: Malin (who I've been to London with the last two times) visited her grandmother who lives in my town. After work, we went and grabbed a coffee and later to my place.

I managed to do some shopping in less than 30 minutes. I'm a professional.

Some of the clothing been bought this weekend.

April 77

This most be the oddest picture for a long time (Photo Booth). However, I bought a new pair of jeans yesterday from the brand April 77 and I love them. I'll upload another picture later because the one above doesn't give a fair picture of them.

Oblivious? Yes!

It's proofed. I'm oblivious. A minute ago, I had my phone in my right arm. A minute later (now) I can't find it. I haven't moved a bit. Call me so I can find it please!

Happy birthday to me!

Finally, I should say. I'm twenty. No longer a teenager. Many of my friends are all hyper about me being twenty, but honestly, I don't value birthday's that much. I value being healthy and having the family and friends I do. They really bring out the best in me, and the worst parts, are because my own mistakes.

The day has been really good. I woke up by my dad and mom singing "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Sandra, happy birthday to you!" like every year. It's quite weird because I never get old enough to not be excited. I'm like a child at Christmas day! I pretend to be asleep but honestly, I've lied awake for the past few hours (could be something about my killing stomach pain, I try to convince myself). I got some birthday gifts such as a new camera, I have a DSLR that I got last Christmas but it's rather hard to bring everywhere. They also gave me that thing that curl your hair. Brain freeze. And money, which I also got from my relatives living in another city. And yeah, I got a lot of flowers as well!

After school and being at home for a while, I was "stolen" by some friends to this restaurant and they really spoiled me! The whole table was filled with gifts and to be honest, I was close to tears. If you read this, I'm so grateful. There's no words. I'm so lucky to have you all in my life.

I'll even be more celebrated this Thursday when my sister and her boyfriend as well as my step grandparents visit us. I'm so lucky.

For a conclusion, here's some pictures.

The decoration been made.

I was happy.The funniest thing must have been when Cissi dropped the lid to the lipstick I'd bought about ten minutes earlier in a glass of water!